After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
In America we eat man semen.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
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