Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
you never un-have a 4some
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Randomize
