id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
My liver just had a heart attack.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
