butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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