The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
