Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
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