so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
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