Texts From Last Night

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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"

  (219): View more from Indiana

  I have so much to learn from you, wise slut

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  (812): Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!" (219): I have so much to learn from you, wise slut http://tfl.nu/eyww
  Replies (20) Good night (3868) Bad night (961)
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  (914): View more from New York

  i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same

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  (914): i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same http://tfl.nu/tcqj
  Replies (39) Good night (1162) Bad night (5611)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house

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  (931): I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house http://tfl.nu/8rln
  Replies (18) Good night (1035) Bad night (5406)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.

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  (813): His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up. http://tfl.nu/dgzw
  Replies (35) Good night (1572) Bad night (4441)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.

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  (252): just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far. http://tfl.nu/f1u5
  Replies (20) Good night (4220) Bad night (911)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on

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  (774): Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on http://tfl.nu/movk
  Replies (5) Good night (2403) Bad night (829)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.

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  (765): Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears. http://tfl.nu/6dpq
  Replies (1) Good night (773) Bad night (1142)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.

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  (917): She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for. http://tfl.nu/k05b
  Replies (7) Good night (3783) Bad night (730)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs

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  (519): The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs http://tfl.nu/wzfm
  Replies (4) Good night (1544) Bad night (731)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  What drink are we having for lunch?

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  (785): What drink are we having for lunch? http://tfl.nu/pv1n
  Replies (5) Good night (1254) Bad night (924)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.

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  (701): Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one. http://tfl.nu/mish
  Replies (8) Good night (736) Bad night (966)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni

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  (330): our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni http://tfl.nu/9cx8
  Replies (6) Good night (545) Bad night (378)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.

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  (+61): There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious. http://tfl.nu/vwm7
  Replies (1) Good night (723) Bad night (297)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today

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  (630): Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today http://tfl.nu/53sc
  Replies (0) Good night (387) Bad night (199)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.

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  (919): He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk. http://tfl.nu/4wxn
  Replies (1) Good night (177) Bad night (325)

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