i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
