Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
19 Worst Song Lyrics of All Time
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
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Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.