i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
