Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
