In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
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