The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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