Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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