.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
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