I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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