Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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