garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
