So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
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