her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize