I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
There's even glitter on my cock...
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