i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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