Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Randomize
