Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
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