But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Randomize