Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
i think i just lost a toe
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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