Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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