What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
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