Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
