oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Randomize