I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize