you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
