I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
