I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
