the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
