there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
We don't watch enough power rangers
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
this hospital has no fireball
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Randomize
