my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
The beer is more important than you right now.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
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Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
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It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
i think i just lost a toe
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
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