i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
