So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize