His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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