I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
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