Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
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