This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
