Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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