so that wasnt chicken after all
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize