i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Randomize
