ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize