You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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