no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
