I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize