I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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