he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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