PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
